I need to wake up!!! It's time i need to wake up from the world i am in.. Wth am i doing all this time with my life... Maybe someone or something woke me up... I guess its due to the past tat i struck myself in that reali f*** up world of my own.. Seriously i need to get a life.. Come to tink of it tat reali happens reali isnt like me... I shld reali starts changing myself not as in i didnt change but for a even betta me... Need some serious thinking and clear myself out from the dream ler... I felt death around me, my dad friend suddenly pass away from heart attack a few daes ago, kinda sad cause he quite close with out family.. todae saw an accident again.. hopefully tat person is alrite.. Under my block another death again.. Haiss why is life so unpredictable and sad... It reali makes mi wanne cherish everything around me, in fear 1 dae i lose everything... Esp my Darbby~ I will like to sae tat, sorri tat all this happens and made euu upset always.. Maybe i have become to stick to euu ler, in fear of so much tat i mght lose euu and the not enuff secure... I wanne work this r/s out with euu, i hope euu felt so too, cause i doesnt wanne have euu out of my life again anymore... School, i have a major mess up in that letters and more letters.. my absent wad is happening, no motivating to school.. wth am i tinking... i will start to resume my normal school ler, no more skipping unless needed... Friends, i have reali little friends, esp in school but i'll try to improve ways with them ba~ Darbby, Hope there is a change for a betta in the r/s and that ur always happi... 1 more thing take care of urself im so worried for euu.. Enuff for tat ler, i know wad i reali wanne and i'll make things work out... Let's talk abt todae ba, skip school cause my dear was absent and actually wanne buy somthing for him and pass him the medicine then go for the afternoon lesson but dear insist me to go school at least take attendence but at the same time i reali is very late for lesson 1/2 hr more = break ler.. In the end didnt go school, went to look for him, brought fish porriage, then call him but no vaild.. sleepin i guess... waited for like 2hrs then went up his hse and knock the door, surpising that he open the door but i know he was reali very angry but all i wanne do was to take care of him when he's sick not as if someone there to take care of him and tat he doesnt need me worried... He doesnt wanne talk to me so i heat up the porriage and leave the medcine there and went out ler, tinking tat he mght stop me but sadly didnt.. i walk around his hse nearby and finally settle down thought of alot alot of things.. like i seldom reali did but recently i started up too ler... cry myself again, haiss... then suddenly a lot crash then accident again, i tink due to its raining.. After like another 1 or 2hrs dear wake up ler, call his hp finally thru but he doesnt wish to talk after a few sms finally he allow mi go hise hse tere ler.. after every long then made up tanks for his forgiving again.. i also made his dae very dulan too.. sorri abt tat.. dear... Then we made spaggti together actually is i made de but in the end make together.. wasnt reali nice cause the noodles kinda hard lor but still nice xD was very hungry moring onli eat bread with coke the whole dae nia... Went home again by cab, haiss waste his money again.. sad =( sorri darbby recently been u paying alot.... Finally reach home ler, bath ler then thought abt alot, then realise alot of tings that needed changes of me, myself and i xD Then now 1plus ler haven sleep >.<~ play dota 1rd with my darbby so happi first time my sniper die 1 time nia and kill a few... got more to learn xD thanks dar this goes to him de wor for his teaching xD

With ♥ From Suzanna [12:05 AM]